Summaries, plans

Everyone does a yearly summary, a lot of people do them publicly. I didn’t have a plan to do mine, I still have very mixed feelings about these posts with summaries and plans. 31 December or 1 January are the same days as the other 363 days of the year.

But I’m going to do it. I’m going to do my public year-end post here. Mainly because it’s not a typical list, it’s my own version, as always.

To the point.

The end of the year, this year, is the time to close things that I no longer want to explore, do, maintain, think about, keep.

That’s it, that’s my summary. A lot has happened this year, a lot of bad things have happened, a few good things have happened. I have no plans except one for next year, because I made plans before and… life happened. So the only plan I have is this.

Take care of myself and those I love.

Find the energy, find the time, find the opportunity and take care of myself and my friend and my love and period.

This means ending all initiatives that are not necessary. Every project I do after hours, every activity that takes up my time, everything that costs me energy and doesn’t help me or the people I love to be better, healthier and happier – is out as of 1 January.

I don’t want to make a list. Some things are stupid, some things are private, some things are trivial, some things could harm others or violate their privacy if named publicly. Nevertheless, it’s all there, and I’m going to spend the ten days between now and the end of the year cleaning it up and closing it.

I’m still recovering from my illness (the test results are still positive), but fortunately I’ve done some things before and what’s left I can deal with without leaving home.

There won’t be a list of my favorite tools, music albums or films, I can see the point of them, I can see why people enjoy doing them and reading them – I enjoy reading some of them too – but that’s not how I think and live.

Everything I do has to have a meaning, that’s my curse. Everything that happened has already happened and stays in the past. That’s my approach to the past. Everything that will happen will happen whether I like it or not, and I cannot do anything about it. It will happen. I can only choose what I’m going to do with whatever is going to happen. That’s my philosophy.

There’s no place here for summaries, and there’s no place here for plans.

That doesn’t mean I don’t think about the past. I do. And I draw my conclusions, but they’re not events, they’re my thoughts (some of which I’ve already shared) and they change, verify or confirm my values. There’s no need to think about the past when the past has already been thought about and concluded.

It doesn’t mean that I don’t know where I’m going and that I’m blindly following what life brings. It means that I have my values and I know my ultimate goal. I’m just not fighting life because I’ve already learned – I’ve learned the hard way – that I can’t win that fight. I can try to follow my values and not lose my ultimate goal in the process.

But if I reach it this year or ten years from now? I don’t care.

I try to enjoy the journey as long as I’m alive and loved and loving.

Both values and goals can change in the process of completing the events. That’s normal, that’s natural, and not to do it would be crazy. So they can change, I can check and change them.

The passing year was a year of letting go of the unnecessary.

The upcoming year is a year of focusing on what is important.

That we have the strength to do the former and the wisdom to find the latter is what I wish for myself and for all of you.